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CATTYWAMPUS AND ENGLISH LANGUAGE THOUGHTS
This does not purport to be a definitive essay on the English language. It is simply an interim report on the current usage of the language as well as one reference to a word that has ancient connections. These days I am obliged to hold onto a sighted person leading me about. This is not…
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CERUMEN
This essay should properly be called, because of its shortness, an essayette. Cerumen is a reasonably important health problem and I would not want the shortness of this essay to detract from its importance. If the truth were known, it would disclose that the proprietor of Ezra’s Essays is now prepared to throw its readers…
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CAPTAIN BELL’S INNATE DECENCY
This is an essay about my military career which ended about 65 years ago. The essay will necessarily record the incompetence of the United States Army but at the same time will celebrate the decency of one commissioned officer. This essay is being recorded at this time prior to my brain delivering a “don’t answer”…
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BAMBI AND THE SEASON OF THE RUT
In the 13 years that Ezra’s Essays have appeared in print, the editor has manfully and cheerfully tackled such third-rail subjects as politics and religion. But in that long period of time, there have been a dearth of essays on the subject of sex. We are going to try to make up for that dearth…
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BASTARDS LIKE ME
I guess that I am finally cornered. I will have to admit that I am a Democrat and that I subscribe to the liberal wing of that party. Today that is called the progressive part of the Democratic Party. But as I progress into my 88th year, and this is being dictated on the Christian…
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BLOWING SMOKE RINGS
Let me take you back perhaps 25 years when it seemed to me that almost everyone smoked cigarettes. Cigarettes require fire at their tips. The fire may be provided by a cigarette lighter, or by a kitchen match, and it can also be provided by matches contained in a small packet that fits precisely in…
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WHEN IT IS ASS-KICKING TIME ALONG THE POTOMAC
My efforts recently have been consumed by writing a song, which is the title of this essay. Sometimes the song seems to be a lullaby and at other times it becomes a dirge. But with the President now in the ass-kicking mode, perhaps it becomes a march or a patriotic song, such as “America the…
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ANOTHER NATION OF IMMIGRANTS
If I were an observant Muslim, I would add the phrase “Blessed be His name” after saying something about Prophet Mohammed. But as most of you know, I am not an observant Muslim and I suspect the Muslims would regard me as nothing more than a pagan. But be that as it may, the point…
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ASKING AND TELLING
I have no intention of misleading the readers of Ezra’s Essays into believing that this essay has anything to do with the current law that forbids members of the military services from disclosing their sexual preferences. Quite to the contrary, this essay has to do with Miss Chicka, my wife, and with blindness. Apparently…
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BACKWARDS IT HAVE I
This morning I was amazed to hear that Levi Johnston and Bristol Palin have announced their engagement. I know that my age is approaching that of Methuselah, and there are those who would accuse me of having antediluvian ideas. But I always thought that the way to romance had to do with a boy and…