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MIRACLES OF MATHEMATICS
This Saturday morning, February 9, my breakfast was largely ruined by listening to a speech by Governor Huckabee which was delivered to the Conservative Political Action Conference, a group of ideologues. Huckabee explained that when he went to college, he did not major in mathematics but rather in miracles. In this case, the miracle business…
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JOHN MCCAIN HAS SUFFERED ENOUGH
Those of you who follow Republican politics will be aware that John McCain is the presumptive front-runner in the quest for the Republican nomination for President of the United States. McCain has such a commanding lead in the delegate count that it is only a matter of days until he is declared the Republican nominee.…
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ENDURING ANOMALIES
The enduring anomalies that are referred to in the title of this brief have to do with religion and politics. Both of those subjects have fascinated me since I was a lad of six years. Now that I am entering my 86th year, it might be said that I am older but no wiser or…
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BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER
When I was in the labor relations business in New York City, a pompous, Harvard-trained lawyer offered me legal advice for about five of those years. In addition to his degree from Harvard, this lawyer had three first names. Obviously, because of his training and his birthright, this lawyer was my superior in every respect,…
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IN THE DEFENSE OF DECENCY
The readers of Ezra’s essays are now showing the wears and tears of age. Some of them have actually become long in the tooth. The question that I have to ask today is whether any of you believe that in the United States there will be a presidential election that is conducted without an assault…
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“OH MY, YOU ARE A DARLING”
Impartial and independent observers have assured me that the readers of Ezra’s essays have been purged of Southern Baptists, Nazarenes, Pentecostals, Holy Rollers, and other evangelical sects. That is a lovely development in view of the fact that before this essay is finished, there will be references to female horniness. I grit my teeth when…
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INSPIRATIONS FROM THE W.C.
The writing of essays requires an infusion of ideas. A good many of my ideas occur to me while I am attending to my duties in the bathroom. For example, you may recall that there were a series of essays which were entitled, “Thoughts While Shaving.” As time has gone on, I still receive thoughts…
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“I LOOK BUT I SEE NOTHING”
What I am really describing here is a job opportunity for men who are burdened with the loss of eyesight that afflicts me. In this short essay I will try to tell you why this is a golden opportunity for men such as myself. Guido Bocciola operated a very fashionable restaurant in New York on…
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A FOUNTAIN PEN AND KEEPERS OF BROTHERS
Preachers, politicians, poets, and the surgeons who perform autopsies remain clueless as to the location of the soul in the human body. Evangelical enthusiasts such as Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson claim that the soul is located in the heart. Every Fellow of the American College of Cardiologists will deny this as junk science. They…