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FLIES
This essay has to do with how men’s clothing is tailored. It does not have to do with the insects that buzz around our heads in the summer time nor does it have to do with fly balls as in the case of baseball. Primarily it has to do with the opening in the front…
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GOVERNORS’ RACES AIN’T WHAT THEY USED TO BE
This fall there will be governors’ races in our two great states of Virginia and New Jersey. Why these two states hold off-year elections is beyond the ken of human understanding. In New Jersey, for example, these off-year elections seem to have been held since the beginning of time. The race in Virginia has stirred…
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CLAYTON 714-J
People with prodigious long-term memories may recognize the title of this piece as being a telephone number. That is indeed the case. It was a four party line associated with the town of Clayton, Missouri. In 1934 or 1935, my father was again employed after a layoff of six years, which was a function of…
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WHO CHANGED THE RULES?
My breakfast was interrupted this morning by a report from Washington that Peter Orszag, the Budget Director for President Obama, had fathered a baby child out of wedlock. He reports that the little child, a girl, is a beautiful creature. It was also confirmed that during the pregnancy of his girlfriend, Mr. Orszag was romancing…
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WHATEVER HAPPENED TO SILENCE?
When I was a youngster, John Gualdoni ran a grocery store in Brentwood, Missouri. It was located on North and South Road. The people in the grocery store were the clerks Bob and Louie, the butcher, and John himself. We had to put up with what Bob and Louie had to wisecrack about as well…
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IT AIN’T NATURAL
My father, who was a taciturn man, didn’t have much to say while he was alive. He has been a resident of the Oakhill Cemetery in Kirkwood, Missouri for 52 years and, one way or another, in recent essays he has turned up a good bit more than he did when he was alive. In…
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OBSCENITIES NATURALLY
As I was growing up, there was one article of faith that had to be observed by my mother and by myself. It had to do with the St. Louis Post Dispatch. The Post Dispatch was an afternoon paper, of which there are very few left. When one of the older children appeared after work…
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ON LANGUAGE: DON’T TOUCH MY JUNK
I hope that it is apparent to all that language is an important part of the human condition. We use it to reason with one another and we use it to praise each other. We use language to denounce each other as evidenced by the recent political campaigns. We use language to persuade each other. …
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MUST WE ALWAYS BE ENTERTAINED?
I hope that I do not have to establish my bona fides with respect to music. I was raised in the suburban area of a musical town where there were symphonies, operettas, a grand opera, and recitals of all kinds. The name of the town was, of course, St. Louis. It may not rank with…
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JUST LIKE ME
Article VI of the United States Constitution provides that there shall be no religious test required of anyone aspiring to work for the United States government. This applies to any office from local dog catcher to the presidency. For example, in 1942, I sought a position as a private in the United States Army. There…