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THE BEST
I know that this essay will arouse some antagonisms but it has been in my mind for several months and it must now be dictated, regardless of the outcome. The essay here will have to do with the best workers, and those who seem to enjoy life in the fullest. According to my estimates, the…
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Re: ODE TO COMMODE
Editor’s note: This is a response (written 12/17) to my commentary on this essay. This was the commentary — A moving piece, to be sure. I wonder though — the toilet might have been the last thing Pop saw, but I wonder about some of the other absolutes. What’s the prettiest thing that he remembers…
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HOBGOBLINS AND GANDER SAUCE
The explanation for this current title will probably appear before the end of this essay. This means that those of you who wonder why this lovely title exists will have to hold on for a while and it will give you a vital interest in the outcome of this little piece. Over the 11 years…
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THE MOTHER OF ALL ARTHRITIS ATTACKS
Seven or eight years ago, the pain of arthritis descended upon my back and legs. I sought advice from the Summit Medical Group, which has a staff of renowned physicians. After a time, I visited the orthopedic department and saw Dr. Corona, who listened to my symptoms but who did very little else. I told…
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FANS
In earlier essays, there was a tribute to railings and to our bashful commodes, both of which bring joy and comfort to our lives. In that same spirit, I believe it is time to pay tribute to fans of all kinds. For the first twelve or thirteen years of my life, I was forced to…
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A ROBUST ODE TO OUR MODEST COMMODES
I suppose that it is commonplace for us to have to overlook the things that give us comfort and pleasure. Men overlook the contributions that women make in cooking their meals and keeping their houses clean. Children often overlook the efforts of their parents in providing schooling for them. So being forgetful is not an…
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RAILINGS
Before I expose my innermost and secret thoughts about railings, I must confess to a vision in my mind that has persisted for almost 50 years. Those of you who follow the fortunes of the Carr family will recall that of the eight children, four were boys. It was my mother’s greatest wish that each…
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GOING HOME
Among my fellow GIs of the Second World War was an idea that enjoyed almost complete universality. The idea was to win the war, bid farewell to the United States Army, and go home. The GIs of World War II came from every walk of life and from every corner of the United States. But…
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PRESENTLY AND/OR THIS-A-WAY
This essay on the English language was inspired by a preposterous source. The someone who inspired this essay departed this vale of tears more than 51 years ago and was generally known as my father. He was a laconic man who used country speak to convey his thoughts to the outside world. Country speak is…
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SETTING THE RECORD STRAIGHT
In a recent essay, I deplored the fact that the tags were missing from the backs of my recently purchased tee shirts. This resulted in my putting the shirts on backwards about 35 to 40% of the time. So I wrote to the president of the Nordstrom company and told him that whoever made the…