The last time I ran for an office of any kind was in January of 1950. In that case, I ran to be the president of Local 6350 of the Communications Workers of America, which was located in my home town of St. Louis. As it turned out, my candidacy was successful but my tour as president of that local lasted only 17 months, in view of the fact that AT&T offered me a management position in Kansas City in July of 1951. So I have some political experience but probably not enough to suit the likes of Sarah Palin, the Governor of the great state of Alaska.
If I were a successful candidate for election to the presidency of the United States of America, there are at least two things that I would do immediately after being sworn in. These actions would not wait for the ceremonial lunch nor could they be put off by walking from the Capitol back to the White House, as Jimmy Carter did when he was elected. These are urgent matters and they demand urgent attention.
As soon as the final words of the oath of office were administered, I would gather the chiefs of the armed services in a room and would instruct them that, from this time forward, they were to carry out the orders of a new President. There would be no more of this business of “We will do whatever the commanders in the field say we ought to do,” as Brother Bush has said for so long. The military leaders would be sat down and would be told what the political leaders intended to do. My first order to the assembled multitude of four-star generals and admirals would be to tell them that this country can no longer afford to fight two wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. They would be instructed on an urgent basis to get the United States disengaged from those two conflicts. The Iraqis would be told that they were now, largely, on their own and the surplus that they have gained from their oil sales, which resides in US banks, would probably be confiscated. In the case of Afghanistan, General Petraeus has made the proper moves in that he is now willing to negotiate with the leaders of the Taliban. The way out of these two wars is not through further armed conflict but through diplomacy. So the first order would be, “Gentlemen, you have 30 days to present me with a plan to disengage us from both conflicts and to bring the troops home.” The fact of the matter is that the United States can no longer afford to urinate away $10 billion to $12 billion per month in pursuit of these misadventures. The billions that we would save by withdrawing from these two conflicts would be used to put Americans back to work, most likely rebuilding our infrastructure. So order number one to the military chiefs is to get us the hell out of Iraq and Afghanistan and to do it post haste.
Before the ceremonial luncheon after the swearing-in ceremony is completed, I would also announce to the world that the prison at Guantanamo would be closed by nightfall and that the prisoners there would be given trials in the court system of the United States. That court system recognizes the writ of habeas corpus and it would probably throw out many of the cases on the grounds that the people who populated Guantanamo were tortured. If that is the case, so be it.
As soon as the closing of Guantanamo could be announced, I would tell the world through the international press, who would be gathered on that inaugural day, that within 60 days or thereabouts the territory of Guantanamo would be returned to the Cuban people. When Ezra becomes President of the United States, the policy would be that there would be no occupation of anyone else’s territory as we have done in Cuba and as we are doing in Iraq.
My expectation is that the announcement of the return of Guantanamo to the Cubans would probably be met with worldwide huzzahs from our friends and from our enemies. Furthermore I would suspect that the list of our enemies would be greatly diminished by the announcement of the closing of the prison at Guantanamo and the return of the territory to the Cubans.
At the ceremonial post inaugural swearing-in, my economic advisors would be gathered and would be asked to get to work on the sad state of the American economy. If it takes a czar to get this job done, candidate Ezra would be more than willing to appoint just such a czar. We have given a collection of banks $25 billion each on the grounds that they would use it to grant credit to each other and to loan applicants. Instead these banks are using that money to acquire other banks and Secretary Paulson and the eminent George Bush are doing nothing about it. If the United States has a $25 billion interest in one of these banks or in several of them, I would expect that the United States would dictate the policy. This is no time for shrinking violets. This is a time for bold action and if heads need to be knocked together, my banking czar should perform that function.
Well, there you have my planned activities for the afternoon of the swearing-in ceremony as President of the United States. Unfortunately, I am not a candidate and will not be elected to that grand office. But my hopes and thoughts are for bold action to get us out of this torpor that we are in, flowing from the housing crisis, the banking crisis, and our very low standing in the view of the rest of the world.
I am fully aware that these days have not been pleasant ones for those of us who have invested our savings in the American stock market. However, there is one great ray of hope. Shortly after the Bush administration took office, the grand Vice President of the United States, Richard Cheney, told the world that “Deficits don’t matter.” The fact of the matter is that deficits do matter and, if they are unattended to, can result in financial chaos. It is that financial chaos that has consumed this country since August of this year and in reality for the last 12 months. I suspect that when historians write the history of this era, they will conclude that George Bush and Richard Cheney were probably the worst President and Vice President of this country in history.
But no matter how you cut it, we live in exciting times. In my own case, I grew up during the Depression of 1929, and it looks as though my departure will be marked by another depression. If that is the case, so be it, but I hope that we have learned that in fact deficits do matter and that we should pay for things as we go rather than pass them on to our grandchildren.
Well, that is the agenda for the first day in office for candidate Ezra. I hope that when the time for the evening meal arrives the world will think better of us and that the American people will discern a ray of hope in this very dismal situation.
Now, on the other hand, if I had continued to serve as President of Local 6350 in St. Louis, by this time I would have completed 58 years of service and would qualify for a pin to put in my lapel. But service to the union was not in the cards and I am left to fantasize about being the President of the United States. Mr. McCain and Mr. Obama will be sent copies of this essay in the hope that they will follow some of the prescriptions laid out herein.
E. E. CARR
October 29, 2008
Essay 342
~~~
Kevin’s commentary: Why not go all the way? Screw the cabinet, let’s get a czar of education, of defense, etc. While we’re at it, who said we should stop with President? Dictator or bust!
Leaving Guantanamo open despite promises to close it has been one of the biggest disappointments to me of this current presidency. There were still over 150 people there as of December of last year. Most all of these have been deemed enemy combatants and denied due process rights. Not that the prison system in the US proper is that much better, but at the very least you will (eventually) get a trial here.