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ON BEING SCARED SPITLESS AND/OR THE BIG GUY SYNDROME
Since the Bushies have departed the political scene in Washington, we find that many of them are emerging from their burrows and holes in the ground to tell us that following the events of September 11, 2001, we were all scared spitless. I have a clear recollection of my thoughts after the destruction of the…
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LIPSTICK FOR PIGS
Logic has taken one brutal beating recently from Condoleezza Rice and from our former Vice President, Mr. Cheney. For example, this past week, which was the last week in April, Madame Rice, addressing a group of Stanford University Students, was asked about waterboarding. She provided an answer that was convoluted as well as full of…
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UP WITH SECULARISM
The Merriam-Webster dictionaries that we have in this house describe faith as a belief not supported by fact. When this country was founded, Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, and the rest knew that faith had to do with subservience to the Anglican Church which had as its head the King of England. And so…
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ANCIENT HISTORY
You may recall that in the late summer of 2008, the American stock market as well as the American banking system took a terrible nose dive. From that time forward, there have been legions of analyses by learned scholars who hoped to tell you what was wrong. As always, there were political arguments. The Republicans,…
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THE WRATH OF GRAPES
Those of you who shop for produce may have noticed over the years that grapes never come from Arab or Muslim countries. The reason for this is fairly simple. The petroleum reserves in those countries are so great that they tend to rise to the surface, which proves infertile to the grape-growing industry. And so…
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SEX, SEX AND MORE SEX
It may seem unseemly for a man of my advanced years to write an essay about sexual matters. On the other hand, it also seems to me that I had no choice in the matter. If my mother were to reprimand me for having thoughts about ungodly matters, I would be forced to tell her,…
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TRANSPARENCIES, LEMMINGS, AND DITTOS
At heart, this essay is about politicians and those who make their living from political commentary. Politicians and those who comment about political events are quick to seize upon a new comment which becomes the comment du jour for several days. The favorite word that is the fad these days is “transparent” or “transparencies.” When…
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A LITTLE MORE OF THISA AND A LITTLE MORE OF THATA
Ben Bernie was the subject of a previous essay distributed recently. Bernie was a very popular band leader who led an orchestra from the 1920s through the 1950s. You may recall that when his orchestra pleased him, he would say, “Yousa, yousa, yousa!” And when he would introduce a variety of songs, he would call…
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PREGNANT PONDERINGS ON POETIZING
Every pulpit pounding preacher will tell you that ecclesiastical confessions are essential to good health. I imagine those preacher were made ecstatic a week or two ago when Bernie Madoff confessed that he had committed eleven felonies. Such preachers will tell you that confessions will fix any ailment known to man or beast. And so…
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A TREATISE ON BEING ELEGANTLY, ENORMOUSLY, AND ENTHUSIASTICALLY SCREWED
A casual observer reading only the title of this essay might conclude that the essay has to do with relations between the sexes. Anyone who knows the proprietor of Ezra’s essays with his seminarian background would dismiss that thought out of hand. But upon further consideration, this essay has to do with diddling. I do…