Perhaps I should spend more time in my bathroom in view of the fact that the preponderance of ideas that occur for these essays come to me during my bathroom visits. I am not alone in extolling the virtues of the bathroom. John Munro, the wonderfully gifted artist and composer, wrote a song not long ago called “While I Am Here.” He is an Australian and moved there from his native Scotland a good many years ago. When I asked Brother Munro the circumstances that led to his writing “While I Am Here,” he told me that he was taking a shower and the song came to him. I would encourage all of my readers to pay attention to the words of John Munro and to take showers regularly. The point is that some of his songs, some of his works, occurred to him as he was visiting the bathroom.
A blind man has great difficulty in making notations on inspirations that may occur while he is engaged in the bathroom. Whatever notations I might save couldn’t be read by me. The alternative is to call my wife and ask her to make a note on the cassette recorder that I will use at a different date. Just recently one of the bathroom inspirations occurred to me. This is basically a philosophical thought. This rare philosophical thought holds that the time of day is mankind’s most democratic institution.
For example, when the twelve o’clock hour of the afternoon is reached, every man and woman takes a break to consider how the afternoon will proceed. It makes no difference whether the man is a rich one or a poor one. The fact is that the noon hour has been reached. It is quite obvious that the rich man may dine on caviar and paté de foie gras while the poor man eats a bologna sandwich. But that is not the point. The point is that the noon hour has been reached and this applies to the wealthy man as well as to all others. There is no such thing as having as having what Mitt Romney says as a retroactive noon hour. As you can see, the time of day applies to everyone, which I consider to be our most democratic institution. I realize that politicians will try to alter this concept by the introduction of daylight saving time. But in the end, the time of day is mankind’s most democratic institution.
Everyone is restricted to the same number of hours. Whether you call them days or nights, hours or minutes, it is the same for everyone. This thought occurred to me in that holiest of places, the bathroom. As such, I think it should be taken seriously.
It appears to me that two giant communist nations have undertaken a desire to tamper with time. In Russia, for example, the same time, which is Moscow time, applies to Vladivostok on the eastern border of the Russia, and westward to the Polish border, a distance of about 3,500 miles. This means that school children, for example, in the Vladivostok region reach school around the mid-morning hours that day. But this is the Russian idea of democracy. I don’t think much of it.
In China, another very large country, there is only one time zone, which is the time zone of Beijing. But in the final analysis, the politicians may tamper with the time of day, but it all comes down to the thought that the time of day is mankind’s most democratic institution.
These thoughts about the time of day come to you from a man who has only intermittently worn a wristwatch. Actually, it was not a wristwatch but a wristwatch whose strap was folded in such a way that it would fit into a little pocket that men have in their jackets. I only used it when I traveled. Ordinarily I used nothing in the way of personal timepieces. But be that as it may, I take great comfort in saying that the time of day is mankind’s most democratic institution.
It may also be argued that the time of day is mankind’s most autocratic institution. However, the thought that the time of day is mankind’s most democratic institution came to me first. I am willing to rest my case on that premise.
E. E. CARR
August 12, 2012
Essay 682
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Kevin’s commentary:
I had to create a new category — philosophy — to contain this post.
I think Pop may be amused to know that I too do some of my best thinking in the bathroom. For me it is the shower. You can ask any of my college roommates — when it came time to write any major paper for class, I would take what I called a ‘thesis shower’ which is exactly what it would sound like. Basically I would do a ton of research on the broad topic and then take as long of a shower as was necessary to assemble the research into the shell of an argument. I’ve been doing this since the highschool days with debate cases, and do it even still with my own personal blogs. I think it is fair to infer that the reason that the “Kevin’s commentary” section on this webpage is generally disjointed is simply that I do not tend to shower immediately prior to writing them.
In any event, I agree with the idea here that time is the greatest equalizer. All the money in the world cannot buy you a twenty-fifth hour in the day, and there’s something wonderful about that.
Pop’s response: The basic premise in this essay is that the time of day is the world’s most democratic institution. I did not write this – but also the time of day is the most autocratic institution in the world. This is a corollary thought. If the time of day is our most democratic institution, then it must follow that the same time of day is our most autocratic institution. If for example, I make a reservation to have a meal at 12 noon, I cannot object if the owner ignores me when I show up at quarter past the noon hour.
I did not write this because it would open up a new can of worms. So I let the democratic proposition stand.
Ezra