CHRISTIAN MINGLE


I rarely listen to commercials broadcast on television.  One recently caught my attention.  The title is “Christian Mingle.”  Under ordinary circumstances, when I have some curiosity about a commercial, I ask the sponsors of the commercial for some detail.  In this case, I do not desire to get involved with Christian Mingle because I suspect that it would result in them getting my phone number or address that I do not wish them to have.  Beyond that, I am not a Christian.
But it appears that it is nothing less than a dating service.  We always look askance at dating services because of the prostitution angle.  Whether Christian Mingle is involved such services, I have no idea.
What it comes down to is that somebody must pay for the voluminous advertisements on television.  There is a financial aspect to Christian Mingle that I do not have a handle on at this moment, but the airwaves on cable television frequently carry these advertisements for them.  In the final analysis, the sponsors of Christian Mingle must make a profit.  I do not know whether they enroll Christians or whether it is a one-time event.  I was wondering whether they would reject one who said that he was not a Christian.  And how would they go about defining how much of a Christian he or she really is?  Could Todd Akin and Paul Ryan join Christian Mingle?
The ads on the television screen appear with such regularity that it is clear that someone must be footing a fairly decent bill from the television networks.  They advertise that they are growing by leaps and bounds and handsprings.
I don’t really know why the Christian Mingle ad has aroused my curiosity.  You may recall that I wrote in an essay that in 1938 or 39, I endeavored to finally learn how to dance.  This was in St. Louis and there were ads in the telephone directory for dance studios.  On the appointed day when I went to the dance studio on Delmar Boulevard, I was met by four or five scantily clad women.  There was no indication of a phonograph to play music that we could dance to.   I was only 18 or 19 at the time, and finally I realized that something was badly ajar here.  As it turns out, prostitution services in St. Louis generally list their services under the heading of Dance Instructors.
I suspect that the inmates of this whorehouse had many moments of belly laughs and knee slapping as they recalled this dumb jerk (me) actually wanting to get dance instruction.  I believe that more than anything else, these thoughts propelled my interest in celestial beings and its advancement of my spiritual life.
From that day forward, I have had great suspicions about such things as dating services and Christian Mingle.  But at the end, I am not a Christian.  Therefore I could not mingle with comely Christian females.  At this point I must ask, where are such things as Jewish mingles or Muslim mingles or even Mormon mingles?  Perhaps this mingling may have tremendous commercial possibilities.  I simply want to get a handle on it before I invest my vast fortune into the mingling proposition.
I realize that this is not an issue of great importance.  But it has aroused my curiosity and I will pursue Christian Mingles until my curiosity is gratified.  But in the meantime, if any of you become involved in Christian Mingles, I would like for you to tell me how it works, particularly how the financial arrangements work.
Well, as you can see, even in my post-partum 91st year, I still am able to exercise my curiosity.  And if any you become involved in Christian Mingles, I wish for you to tell me what it has done for your spiritual life.  Until that has been accomplished, I will view the Christian Mingles as a dodge, much like the dance instructors in St. Louis advertising the wares of prostitution.  I will wait with bated or unbated breath until I receive some reports of your experiences with Christian Mingle.
 
E. E. CARR
August 11, 2012
Essay 683
 
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I’ve got some Christian friends on Facebook. I will use the previous post as a hook to get them to come to this site, and then hopefully they will see this essay and be (divinely?) compelled to answer.
My suspicion is that Christian Mingle is probably not for whoring, but one can never be too sure.
Since I am now unemployed as of this past Friday (internship ended!) I am tempted to use some of my free time to set up a Christian Mingle account and go undercover, as it were, to answer some of these questions.
But my Dad reads this and I think he’d be pretty pissed if he found out that I was messing around with this type of research instead of trying to get, you know, reemployed. Jen also may not approve.
Another day…
 


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